Love & Marriage....

I am in love with my husband all over again!

I have mad love for him and its all just starting to come back. No, seriously, Chris and I have been focused on Corey this past 5 months (not to mention the 9 months waiting for him to come out) that we have drifted apart.

One drunken night, it all came out and I told him there was no spark and that we aren't even intimate anymore. When you're drunk, the truth comes out whether you want it to or not. Chris said some choice words to me but I hurt his feelings really bad that night and ever since then we are making up for it to each other.

Another eye opener was when a friend was having a fight with her husband and I had asked if she was ok. Her response was "We're okay, we are just having one of your and Chris's fights." She was saying their fight was comparable to our fights. It kind of upset me that she would say that but I had it coming when we argue out in the open in front of people. All couples fight, but its the ones that are out in the open that really counts, not because you'll remember them but other people will remember them and so will you. I don't remember that we fight about who's doing what around the house but I do remember the fight we had when we were at his uncle's wedding in '07 and I drove off mad (I didn't leave him, he got in before I could drive off, door dinging his brother's car along the way)

So, with those events taking into play, I realized he's my husband and I wouldn't trade him for anything ...okay maaaaybeee Tom Brady. But until Tom comes along, I'm really appreciating Chris a lot more now for what he does. And man, does he do a lot. My husband cooks, cleans, does laundry, vacuums, takes care of the baby, takes out the trash, does grocery shopping, mows the lawn, etc. I have talked to him about this and he says he appreciates me, too, which makes me happy. I asked what he appreciates about me and he said the way I take care of Corey, the way I take care of myself. He loves my body which is crazy since I just had a baby. He loves that I'm independent, that I can go have my fun while he has his. He loves that I work and bring home a pay check. He says thats why he does all the stuff I mentioned above without complaint. He knows that one thing we compromised when having Corey was that I would go to second shifts but he also knew I would not be cooking and laundry when I had to work. He is a sweetheart and I am so lucky to have him. Its made me realize I can't let him go so he's stuck with me and vise versa.

So we are fighting less and wrestling more...if you know what I mean!!


OOOOHHHH! One other thing I keep forgetting to blog about

Corey has said his first word!! Dada...!

He started saying that on July 17th. I had a small ping of disappointment but I'll give Chris this one thing since Corey looks just like me. And of course because like I said above, Chris really deserves the honor for all that he does for us!

We love you 'dada'!

Seperation Anxiety & My Grandmother

It is happening...Corey won't let me put him down and when he is with people and I leave his sight, he bawls and bawls. I knew it would happen one day but I didn't know it was going to be this early on. The good news is that when we leave him somewhere with a grandparent or a babysitter, he doesn't seem to be phased. Its only when I put him in someone else's arms and right away he realizes those arms aren't his mommies. And I have become one lazy mommy putting everything aside from scrapbooking to cleaning to even shopping just because I don't want him crying in his swing in the living room or even stroller because I can't hold him or carry him around. So, I do nothing at all and Chris comes and the house is messy and the groceries aren't there. I need a maid or a nanny. No, I need some balls and just let him cry, right?!

He got this way because of me always having him in my arms. He is spoiled because I have spoiled him. So I shouldn't complain. I love the little guy! In all seriousness, Corey will be growing and crawling and walking soon so I should cherish the time where he wants to be in my arms!

Like I said, I'm getting to be pretty lazy at things and I know Chris is getting upset about it. He picks up the slack though and I really really appreciate it and love him for it. I'm hoping he knows how much I love him. I'll get there someday where I have the energy to feed, bathe, and play with Corey along with clean, cook, and run errands.

Last week was a really hard week to live through. My grandmother came to Illinois on the 16 of June and has been struggling to adjust. The last weekend in June, she had lots of stress build up on her weak body and was rushed to the hospital that Monday. Tuesday I was waiting to go see her while the doctors did a stress test on her. She was to be in there for 3 hours and barely and hour later the doctor called my cousin whom I was with at the time and told her to get back to the hospital asap. We were freaking out. The dr said her heart stopped beating for 15 seconds. We were in shock. The doc said he was going to put a temporary pace maker in her for that day and sched the next day for surgery for a permanent pacemaker. At that time, all my aunts and uncles rushed to her bedside along with most of my little cousins and my aunt and her family with my brother and his girlfriend who all live in Texas. I went in late to work that day, not wanting to leave but knew I had to. The next day my family from Texas came right before she went into surgery. It was terrible seeing her cry from being so scared and watching her be wheeled out. I freaking cried and cried. But it was kind of a distraction when I finally saw my little brother and him finally meeting Corey. It was so cute how he wanted to keep him all day. I decided it would be best to stay in Bloomington to see my grandma and spend time with my family in the light of her surgery so I called in and I am so happy I did. I was able to see my grandma come out of surgery and hang out with my brother and his girlfriend for a while.

Needless to say, when you have an elderly in the hospital there is going to be fighting among family and ours was the worst. Everyone fought and I just stayed back and stayed out of it. For the most part, I was just happy to see family and to see my grandma come out of it alive and well. She is truly the strongest out of anyone I know and I'm so happy to call her my grandma.